The other night, I found myself bleary-eyed in front of the television at 2:00 AM, watching "The Pick-Up Artist"
Have you seen this? Here is this fellow, Mystery, who promises to take eight losers and turn them into well, a pick-up artist. Oh, look! He even wrote a book!
I just, I cannot imagine. Who goes home with these men? HOW does this work? ARE YOU FLIPPING KIDDING ME? They are relying on the alcohol right?
First of all -- his name is Mystery, strike one.
Second -- the dude is wearing GOGGLES on his head. Strike two.
Third -- his wingman, MATADOR is wearing red leather pants. Strike three.
Fourth -- He has a soul-patch. Ew.Also, he is wearing what looks to be roadkill on his head AND his jacket.
He is promising to make them so good at picking up women that one day, oh happy day, they will teach it to their sons. In theory, Mystery can pick up any woman ALIVE. Ha, I would LOVE to see that. Honestly, if he approached me at a bar, I'd think he was a gay pirate of some sort.I have never really understood the concept of picking someone up at bar, but thats a personal preference I guess. I tend to be that girl at the bar that guys just know isn't interested (especially now that there is a big ol' glittery ring on my finger, but even before that as well). I just, I don't know, I never felt that I had to be accomodating to the learing drunk fellow trying spark a conversation whilst staring down my shirt, you know? Crazy huh?
There was one endearing Brit that got a smile out of me when he told me he needed help counting our "crazy American money". Oh dear, go ahead and insult my national currency while establishing that you are unable to count.
One guy called me "his little chicken," I'm still not sure how I feel about that, was he making fun of my legs? Or my hair? What is the worst pick-up line that has been used on you? Or..what is the best? Have any of them worked?! Do tell!!